Since
I was young I have always had a strong fascination and curiosity in understanding
how things worked. Over time, this curiosity led me to become increasingly
critical towards certain topics such as religion and superstition.
In
my polytechnic days, I had a classmate who, like myself, was a bit unorthodox,
but in an entirely opposite fashion as he was extremely religious. We got along
really well initially, as there were some common topics and past experiences to
share. Conversations with him was always a delight – at least until when the
topic of religion finally came up.
He
had invited me to join him on a visit to church on a Sunday. I was hesitant to
agree as I was highly introverted at the time and was not interested in meeting
strangers, especially since it was for the cause of a higher power. It took me
a while to say: “No.” and to my surprise, he appeared to be unfazed by my response.
However, everything changed after this incident. He began telling me stories about
his personal encounters with the lord and saviour.
At
first, I took an accommodating stance and listened to what he had to say,
hoping he would change the subject. Instead, he droned on and on. I was at the
peak of my frustration and I challenged him on his beliefs. He of course was
appalled at my sudden rebuttal and began reciting quotes from his bible. It was
a tense situation as we argued on and on about our disagreements with each
other’s views.
In
the end, it was he who decided to give up on the argument and take on the
avoidance stance. I followed suit. From that moment on, we hardly ever talked
to each other as our relationship grew further and further apart.
To
conclude, I feel that as humans we should always live by the quote “live and
let live”. It is at many times, pointless to impose certain ideologies upon
others, if it is not absolutely necessary. A confrontation may only end well if
all parties are agreeable on one single goal: To better themselves.
Question: How would you personally interact with people who are overly sensitive and pushy at the same time?
[Update]
Read and commented:
Syarief
Rui Shuang
Cheng Wei
Question: How would you personally interact with people who are overly sensitive and pushy at the same time?
[Update]
Read and commented:
Syarief
Rui Shuang
Cheng Wei
Hi Chyi Yang,
ReplyDeleteInteresting description of events. It makes me feel as if I have experienced them as well. Regarding your question, I feel that there are numerous ways to deal with people like this. Personally, I would use a "collaborating" approach. By making my goals and interests clear, and occasionally expressing my views, it allows me to engage in a meaningful conversation with said individual. This also enables the individual to know my boundaries, and thus, he is able to gauge the limits of the conversation. However, if said individual is still being overly pushy, I would probably take an "accommodating" stance and just listen.
With that, I hope that you will have better encounters of the pushy variety.
Hi Chyi Yang,
ReplyDeleteI have also experience this sort of situations too. I am a person who believes that it is up to one to decide whether or not he/she believes that a higher power exists and do not question or challenge them about their beliefs. As those who are pushy and sensitive about their beliefs are also my good friends, I know that if I were to question and challenge them about their beliefs, they would be defensive and distance themselves away from me. This is why I suggest that we should not challenge them on such sensitive topics.
When I am invited by friends to go to Church, I would always turn them down nicely. If they pry that I should give it a go as it is 'fun' or that God exists or start talking about stories and encounters about their lord and saviour, I would explain my stance to them. However, I would be careful not to insult them. If they go on and on about the topic, I would think that the best approach would just to keep quiet and listen.
I suggest that we should have a more accommodating approach towards these people so as to keep their friendship, and whenever they are being too pushy, state our views in a respectful way so as to not insult them.
Hello Chyi Yang, should I be thrust into the exact same situation as you, I would also have taken a similar method of conflict management. I personally believe that religion is something that should never ever be brought to the table unless there are certain restrictions placed upon them by their beliefs. History has already shown us time and time again of the numerous number of conflicts that arose from differences in religious beliefs, but I digress.
ReplyDeleteHi Chyi Yang, I can't say that I've ever found myself in such a situation in the entirety of my 22 years of existence, but if I ever found myself in such a situation, I would have respectfully declined and ask that he respect my choice in return. I believe that in such a scenario, being accommodating is out of the question, your own thoughts and desires must be asserted. Additionally, I personally feel that a true friend will respect your decisions and refrain from any further attempts at converting you.
ReplyDeleteCheers,
Aaron
HI Chyi Yang,
ReplyDeleteI believe that religion is an important aspect in a person's life. However, when taken too far, it could go the other way. Personally, I would decline his offer stating that I respect his devotion to the lord and the saviour. But, i have my own beliefs. Instead of confronting or accommodating i would take the compromising route such that when he were to go too far when we are the conversation about his religion, i would gently remind him.
Regards,
Lim Jun ze